Wife being dominated

But that doesn't mean that being a submissive is easy. For some women, coming to terms with a submissive identity can run up against ideals of feminism; for others it can affect their entire way of loving and relating. In this week's installment of our interview series Love, Actually , exploring the reality of women's sex lives, Rose a pseudonym , 40, shares what it's like to reveal to her husband of seven years that she wants him to be the dominant half of a BDSM relationship. When I was 19, I became involved in my very first sexual relationship. The man I fell in love with had a very dominant personality, in a way that made me feel cared for, loved, and safe. He was extremely tall and had very broad shoulders and enormous hands that made my own feel dainty and sweet in comparison.

I work full time, I go to school full time and I support myself through all of it. Women are raised to act pure and chaste and I find that disgusting. Being his little sex slave is my way of rebelling against a society that tries to oppress female sexuality. But nothing else gets me off quite like it. The other day he tied me to his bed, legs spread wide, while he went to run errands. It made me so wet knowing that he was out there thinking of me tied up back home, that by the time he finally returned and started fucking me, I came instantly. Sex is a mind game to me.

One night, after too many whiskey sours, the conversation among a group of my closest friends and I turned to sex. We're not a judge-y group, nor are we bashful when it comes to providing the intimate details of our sex lives. And, yet, when one of my friends revealed that she falls off the orgasmic cliff when her boyfriend calls her a "whore" just as she's about to come, she lowered her eyelids to the table. She seemed almost apologetic. In a really good way.

In relationships, there is a certain pattern — the higher you praise a woman, the more she manipulates you. But such a situation, of course, is not the norm. Usually, it happens when there is inequality in a relationship between a man and a woman, in which a lady feels superior.